Ryan Thomason

WPR Discusses: The Royal Wedding

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We all have a little something to say about the royal wedding that is going down soon. Then in typical WPR fashion, we just turned juvenile in the end. Let us know what your thoughts are.

Evan Burkey

It may as well be celebrity apprentice: I care so very, very little.

Jamie Gibson

If you’re an anti Royalist in the UK like myself then to put it quite bluntly, you are fucked. You can’t escape this masquerade of appraisal for an archaic system. I’m all for British traditions but the fact is that we still have a system that became obsolete years ago, whether the Royal Family is nothing more than a Tourist attraction or not. Whether they make their worth in tourist money is not the issue, it’s the fact that taxpayers in Britain are paying for this Royal Wedding and all of the Royal Family, which for a supposed democratic society, just seems ridiculous. They might as well just be any other rich celebrity family that just happens to be called the Monarchy.

Jeff Seale

*Crawls out from under rock*

What happened? Where? Were there video games?


*Goes back under rock*

Ryan Thomason

I honestly don’t care at all about this wedding. I’m mostly annoyed at all the Royal Wedding type shows that are currently saved on the DVR that is taking up precious minutes that could go to shows like Adventure Time…or Adult Swim shows.

I’ve never understood Americas fascination with British Royals, we apparently can never totally shake ourselves from the eyes of the crown since we gained independence from the Monarchy in the Revolutionary War. Then you throw in the whole “all girls want to be a princess someday” illusion that apparently a lot of women still secretly hope for. Basically, all this wedding is for people to take advantage of morons who will pay to do anything to make themselves feel like they are a part of this whole shindig. All this wedding does is just a way for people to make money on a temporary moment in time.

James Helsby

Well, I think it’s kinda cool. My wife is stoked for it, but mainly she just wants to look at the outrageous outfits. My mother (former brit) is super excited for it. My cousin’s husband is actually on police officer who is on duty at the wedding, so I think we are all watching to see if we can see him in the crowd.

Other than that, it’s just a cool thing. I mean, who wouldn’t want to marry a prince? well, princess. but you know, I make that statement for all the ladies out there. :-)

Ryan WIlson

Oh, this wedding coverage is definitely all about the merchandising. Since we’re in between sports championships, people need stuff to blindly throw money at. We can almost guarantee that QVC has a stock pile of plates just waiting to be plastered with those royal mugs (for only $29.99! Supplies are limited.)

That being said, you can’t fault the couple for marrying out of love. Just expect the media to be there watching every speed bump, overexaggerating it, and selling magazines off of it.

Evan Burkey

Wait, British tax money is going into this spectacle? That is a load of horseshit.

Jamie Gibson

And at a time when we’re receiving brutal spending cuts from a conservative government, but it’s already to throw a dozen million or so at someone’s wedding.

Dennis “Yashoki”

I had no idea taxes were being used for this. Thats just ridiculous. All that money could go to rebuilding the life size Gundam that was destroyed by the tsunami! You know, something important.

Xopher Reed

C’mon you know that Japan has a full size functional Gundam…that’s why we used our earthquake weapon to cause a tsunami on that part of japan.

Scott Mason

Just wait til Wales finishes the giant dragon…

Dennis “Yashoki”

Watch for Mexico’s Sombrero Bombs.

Ryan Thomason

Canadians will pour some Maple Syrup on everything though, then speak French to mess with everyone.

Robert Chesley

Wow. Wait until the USA drills them for oil.

Dennis “Yashoki”

At which point Bear Grylls will drink his own piss, thus ending the entire engagement.

Jeff Seale

Pee drinking? Alright I’m in.

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