Ryan Thomason

Tila Tequila Hates Juggalos: WPR Owner Frowns

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Everyone here at WPR knows that our supreme leader, Xopher is a Juggalo. His JNCO Jeans, dreadlocks, and clown paint have long been stored away, but we know he looks at them longingly and does a deep sigh. Since he is working the night shift, and isn’t privy to our daytime rousing anymore I thought this would be special just for him.

She is apparently wants to attempt to bankrupt the organizers of “Gathering of the Juggalos” festival where she was attacked by the crowd with rocks, bottles, and human excrement. “If you just look at these people, or monsters, whatever they are, they looked very angry and violent,” Tequila said.

The assault subsided briefly when comedian Tom Green, who had performed earlier, diverted the crowd’s attention with a dance.

After Green left the stage, a large rock soared from the crowd, striking Tequila’s face. Tequila eventually escaped, but only after windows in her sports utility vehicle were smashed, according to the local sheriff.

I don’t know about you guys, but this festival sounded pretty damn cool actually. Why the hell was she there in the first place?

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