Alan Smithee

The Walking Dead – “TS-19”

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Believe it or not, he's always got this look on his face

Damn, it’s over already…now we have to wait another ten months before we get new episodes of this amazingly well done television series. Now if they can only manage to keep me as enthralled to come back every week as I have these past six, I’m down.

As far as this episode being the season finale, I’m a bit pissed I must say. But before I get to my usual “what the fuck are these people thinking?” gripes, I must say that this was still some of the best television that my monthly cable check can buy. I’d gladly take six finely crafted shows over normal network television like “The Big-Bang Theory” and “Two-and-a-half Derps”. The talent that it takes to balance hope and sheer horror on the same razor’s edge isn’t apparent in 95% of what you can get out there, but thankfully we get that with this show and so many others on AMC.

Now, for what you’re really here to read about, the synopsis followed by my catty comments about the whole thing. I have to say it, because there are those out there that would be pissed without it, but there be spoilers a plenty ahead, you’ve been warned.

This episode, we find our group of survivors inside the CDC building that they worked so hard at gaining entrance to last time. They think that they’ve finally landed in the Emerald City, El Dorado, or any other mythical place that promises what can’t be delivered. They think that now all of their worries are behind them as they are able to eat, drink, be merry, and have shower montages.

It’s only after the night of wine drinking and said shower montages do we find out what’s really going on. Turns out that the building is set to assplode when the power runs out as to not let anything in the building survive or escape (think diseases, cause you know…it is the CDC we’re talking about here), and their host Dr. Jenner turns out to be a Jamestown wannabe as he thinks that he’d be doing the group a favor by locking them in the building so they can all go out in style as a group.

And now a word about the sub-plot of Shane and Lori. We finally get to see at the beginning of this episode how hard Shane worked at bringing Rick with him from the hospital…and how he thought that Rick was actually dead, because he listened to Rick’s heartbeat with his ear on his chest right after hearing gunfire indoors and a rocket blowing shit up. Yeah, if I was in as big of a hurry to sleep with my partner’s wife, I too would half ass it. Also dude, way to go with the attempting to rape Lori while drunk. You’ve officially moved to the top of the “I hope you die list” as season two comes around.

In the last few minutes of this episode Dr. Jenner gains a bit of composure and lets the crew grab their shit and leave but in order to do so, they have to grenade a window with one from Ed’s punching-bag of a wife’s purse. Don’t get me wrong, but didn’t Rick have that thing first when he took it from the tank? The group absconds from the building and holds up in their cars as the building is set to blow with only one of the survivors staying around with Dr. Jenner…it’s ok though, nobody really cared for this lady anyways.

They drive off at the very end in the search of who knows what. END SEASON.

Here are my gripes about this whole episode:

First, the CDC storyline was completely pointless and really could have gone without telling. Sure, it did give us a few character revelations such as Rick’s fears that nobody will survive the zombie apocalypse and Shane’s high-water pant technique at subduing best friend’s wives on top of a pinball machine. This episode was only helpful as it showed us the internals of how a zombie comes into being through a CG MRI video of Dr. Jenner’s wife going from hot babe to cold zombie within minutes.

Second, I realize it would be boring television to have it this way, but doesn’t it bug anyone else that these people pass up every single opportunity to get more armament and equipment? Wouldn’t you rather be driving around a big fucking Army truck than a piece of shit Winnebago or a slightly effeminate Jeep Wrangler? I for one would love roof mounting a .50 Cal machine gun on whatever my current ride was if that was the case…it’s seriously just sitting right there for the taking.

Third, the first night where you feel like you don’t have to worry about anything coming to get you while you sleep, and the best idea that any of them could come up with is “HEY, LET’S GET DRUNK!”? Really, I think that would be the least of my worries at that point of my life. Celebrating is one thing, but they were just being stupid.

I could probably go on, but I don’t want people to get the impression that I hate this show, because I don’t. I enjoy the hell out of it, but with a limited season of six episodes, you’d think they would try to get to more of a cliffhanger position or a good enough place to call it a season rather than the CDC blew up and we’re on the road again. It’s seriously a great show and I’ll be picking it up on Blu-Ray as soon as it’s available…but like anyone from my generation we have to overly critique the things we love, that’s a big part of being a geek. Trust me, I was just as hard on Battlestar Galactica when that was on TV.

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