Ryan Thomason

The Adventures of Eric and Goosh: Ultimate Geek Fighting

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It’s Thursday, you’re favorite day, because it’s new Eric and Goosh Day

Eric and Goosh stand opposite of each other in a steel cage ring, sweat drip off the two as they hungrily stare the other down. The crowd is cheering in the small arena, fists are pumping in the air, popcorn is being lost onto the ground, and beer is chugged down gullets. The lighting has been rigged so that only the center stage is bathed in an intense unnatural glow, outside of the ring. Only eyeballs flicker in the darkness, the reflection of the light before them illuminating of their retinas casting and eerie feel to the crowd, it was intoxicating.

Goosh is bare chested, his muscles toned from an intense 2 hour workout routine daily, protein shakes, cans of tuna fish, and water. He slides his right palm through his hair, as he licks his lips, and pops open his jaw to stretch it from side to side. He slaps his hands on his thighs, which are large and ready to spring like some predatory beast.

Eric stands coolly in his corner, wearing a black long sleeved shirt with a hoodie on the back, black jeans, and fingerless gloves his tall frame at 6’3” towers over Goosh’s meager 5’11. Eric is lanky and entirely out of shape, it looked as if the strut down the aisle and into the ring had taken some out of him.

But everyone knew this would be a one sided fight anyways.
The referee steps into the middle as Eric and Goosh join him, both men had snarls on their faces, and were ready for a fight.
“You two know the rules, no gouging, no below the belts, and no hooking. Also, no doubles, only singles in this fight. Got it” The striped commander asked. Both men nodded.

“LET’S GET IT ON!” The ref shouted as he dropped a hand down.
“Wuss” Goosh started

Snorting, Eric shook the first volley and retorted, ”Imbecile”

“Pussy” Goosh shot back, rocking from side to side as he stood in place

Eric rolled his eyes before speaking. “Peon”

Goosh hesitated for a second, his brows furrowed down in concentration. “Jerk” he replied.

“Pest” Eric shot out of his mouth, his fans cheering wildly.

“NERD!” Goosh angrily replied.

Eric coolly batted aside the baited attempt to take him out of his game.

“Established.” He responded, much to the adoration of the crowd, he was gaining their favor, the word had a double meaning attack on Goosh!

Goosh looked at the ref for a foul, but the man only shook his head at Goosh, it was a well played word and within the rules. Stammering, Goosh tried to reign in his anger. “ASSHOLE!” He tried.

“Scoundrel” Eric responded without a hesitation.

“Pirate?” Goosh questioned back at him. Then he realized his mistake and put both his hands up into the air before giving a long shouting and falling to his knees.

“NOOOOOOO!” Goosh bellowed into the air as the crowd threw cups and other assorted items at him.

“You suck at Ultimate Word Fighting.” Eric smugly told his friend, as he lifted a single finger into the air, much to the adoration of his fans.

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