James Helsby

Hollywood out of Ideas: “It’s kinda like Dante’s Peak, but in ancient Italy.”

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Great premise, huh? You ready for a ancient disaster pic about the destruction of Pompeii? Sounds boring as snot balls to me.

Imagine if you will, that you are living in the once great city of Pompeii. Living your life, enjoying all that the Roman empire has to offer. Orgies nightly, vomit and troughs of food. In that order no less. You live a comfy life in slight servitude, and are quietly banging your master’s daughter.

Suddenly, Mount Vesuvius errupts and burries you in ash. Sounds like fun, doesn’t it?

Well, it’s coming. From Variety,

“Pompeii,” scripted by Lee Batchler and Janet Scott Batchler, will center around the romance between a slave and the daughter of the slave’s mater amid the eruption of Mount Vesuvius in A.D. 79 and destruction of Pompeii. No actors have been cast and no start date’s been set.

I can basically picture this as some sort of a demented cross between Dante’s Peak and The Last of the Mohican’s. And unfortunately, it sounds just as interesting. The thing about these historical disaster movies is… We know how they end. That’s why it’s called History.


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