Hey fat ass, want to be a Hero?

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Just kidding, there’s no openings in the Justice League for an overweight guy. But if you want to lose that beer gut, VPT Technologies wants to help. VPT are the guys that made Wii Fit and Let’s Yoga, and it seems the killing they made with Wii Fit just isn’t enough. According to Siliconera, the developer has recently trademarked Fitness Hero and Workout Hero, which I assume is in preparation to branch out from the Wii to the other consoles. I think it’s a little superfluous to trademark both titles, but they’re likely just trying to stifle competition.

Now as an aside, can I just say that the amount of games with “Hero” in their names is getting goddamn ridiculous? Unless you have superpowers, serve in the military, or are a policeman or firefighter, you are not a hero. Guitar Hero got a free pass because at least guitarists pull tons of pussy night after night, and that is near hero-like. But then we got DJ Hero (a cool occupation, but nowhere near being a hero) and Band Hero, which doesn’t even fucking make sense. A band is almost always at least two people, and “Hero” is a singular noun. You can’t put those two words together! And now we finally have Fitness & Workout Hero, which is tricking overweight people into thinking that they are beautiful and unique snowflakes just for losing a couple of pounds. Don’t get me wrong, weight loss is no easy task, and is a very noble goal, but thousands of people do it every day, and they’re not getting the key to the city.

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