Ryan Thomason

Geek Dad Report: Having Two Kids is Exhausting

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I want to tip my hat to any single parents out there. I don’t know how you manage to still have a sense of sanity, but kudos to you good sir/madam. I in turn now, look my wife in the eyes and all I see is the sheer exhaustion that emanates from her. We had a talk one night after we had our daughter home for a couple of weeks. We chuckled at how at this point with our son, we complained about how hard everything was. With one kid, we took turns taking naps while the other held him, the house was quiet, except for the TV. Now, what is life like?

Well, the house is never quiet for one thing. If one of us is holding the baby, and the other is taking a nap, our now 2.5 year old son has a hard time not being the center of attention. So he likes to take his tool box into the living room and build pretend tree houses on the walls. If that isn’t enough, and you aren’t keeping an eye on him as the lower half of your butt falls asleep like mine does in the rocking chair we have for the baby, you start to look around when things get TOO quiet. Usually he is in his room, as one morning I found he had taken out his markers and decided that coloring all over his walls was wicked awesome. This type of behavior never happened, because when you only have the one kid, regulation is easy as hell.

All those people out there that had 2 or more kids, and told me; “Oh, it’s so easy after the first one.” You are a damn liar. I think the most conversation my wife and I can get in is us shouting over our daughter who wants to nurse, or our son who wants to play. That conversation is usually 30 seconds long, and after that we say ‘love you’ before exhaustingly falling into bed and going to sleep for 3 hours, which will be when the baby want to nurse again. I do love changing diapers at 3 in the morning, though, and usually I end up taking that feeding shift. I get to go watch some TV shows on the DVR while I feed and burp my little girl; also, there are some wicked awesome commercials on at that time in the morning.

I do have a recommendation for you geeky parents out there, I surprised my wife with a Date Night (which we ended up seeing the movie the same name) and all I can say is wow. A quiet car ride where we could discuss what we wanted and a meal without interruption? I went to the BATHROOM by myself and didn’t have my son commenting on my standing and peeing into the toilet. I bet my wife has dreams of what it is like to use your bathroom at home without a little one coming in to see what’s up.

I don’t think I’m painting a good picture here of how great it is being a Geek Dad. Yes, it is tiring, mentally/physically exhausting, and puts a strain on your relationship with your spouse. The good times when you watch your kid learn something and finally ‘get it’ are amazing, or when they start talking (sometimes too much) and give you those little antidotes that leave you grinning for the rest of the day. When I asked Lincoln to clean up his room once, he started putting all of his toy tools into his toy box, when I asked him why he wasn’t putting his tools on the big tool bench that came with them he looked at me and smiled. “Oh! I get it!” he replied, and put all of his tools then on the tool bench, it’s little things that like that fuel me as a parent. At free comic book day, he could point out most of the characters we were picking up and knew their names correctly. It was a proud moment for me, and the guy at the register even gave Lincoln a not free comic for free because he was impressed with Lincoln. Lincoln gasped as he was given the comic, as a ‘present’ which only sweetened the moment.

Even though, I feel like a zombie half of the time, and my wife and I don’t get to have the time with each other like we used to. I know the future is awesome for my family, when we have family game nights and my kids want to play DnD or Risk, I’ll know that I’ve done a good job.

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