Dumbo
Directed by: Tim Burton
Screenplay by: Ehren Kruger
Based on Disney’s Dumbo by Otto Englander, Joe Grant, Dick Huemer
Based on Dumbo by Helen Aberson, Harold Pearl
Starring: Colin Farrell, Michael Keaton, Danny DeVito, Eva Green, Alan Arkin
Music by Danny Elfman
Production companies: Walt Disney Pictures, Tim Burton Productions, Infinite Detective Productions, Secret Machine Entertainment
Release date March 29, 2019
Running time 112 minutes
It was a cold December morning in Salt Lake City when I was born, it was a Tuesday. You could tell it was Tuesday because the bathrooms smelled like despair, hopeless lost dreams, and Tuna. I began to grow at an alarmingly normal rate and after 30 years I achieved definite adult-like shape and realized that I had squandered my talent-like abilities. One day I will do something about that squandering, after I finish watching Doctor Who, and if my offspring leave me alone for five minutes.