Ah The Flintstones. It’s another classic cartoon from the golden age of cartoons. A perfectly innocent cartoon which is filled with charm and leaves you feeling good about yourself…OR AT LEAST THAT’S WHAT HANNA BARBERA WANTS YOU TO THINK. You see, The Flintstones isn’t as innocent as it seems. The cartoon makes itself look as if it is set in the stone ages, but actually, after noticing cryptic clues while watching the cartoon recently (it was 11am and nothing else was on), I’ve realised that The Flintstones is actually set in an apocalyptic future. Now you can find out why thanks to this award winning journalism.
1) Bam Bam Is A Mutant
Think about it, have you ever seen a baby that can pick up people with ease, with one arm, and throw them around like a ragdoll? Exactly. Clearly Bam Bam’s ancestors were heavily affected by radiation from nuclear winter and this has given him mutant powers down the line. Why do you think Bam Bam was an orphan before he was adopted by Barney and Betty? He killed his parents with his mutant strength, that’s how. Another way we can tell that he is a mutant is that he has white hair. I mean, who has a baby with white hair? Bam Bam’s mutant strength is just one reason why The Flintstones is set in an apocalyptic future.
2) Dinosaurs And Humans Living Together?
Peter Venkman was right about mass hysteria, but it doesn’t come from cats and dogs living together. For starters, as far as know, humans weren’t even around during the age of the dinosaurs, so how exactly are there dinosaurs in the stone age? After all, they were wiped out. You know there are dinosaurs and humans living together? APOCALYPTIC FUTURE, THAT’S HOW. Either dinosaurs had been living deep underground for eons or when the apocalypse hit, it mutated some animals back into dinosaurs. Obviously this mutation must have made most of them house trained, because for example, Fred has his pet Dino above and he also uses dinosaurs while he is working for Mr.Slate. What they don’t show is the problem Mr.Slate has with some of his employees being eaten by dinosaurs. Speaking of Mr.Slate… (hit the jump)
3) How Could Cavemen Run Such Advanced Operations?
Bloody hell, cavemen could only communicate in grunts, nevermind run businesses, shops as well has have laws, vehicles, theatre, music and of course, ties! What kind of cavemen have ties? Those of the future apocalyptic kind, that’s who! Clearly people have had to rebuild their lives over generations after the apocalypse hit and because they didn’t have the luxuries of their pre-apocalyptic ancestors, they had to resort to cavemen-like tools and equipment. Also, where are the other nationalities in The Flintstones? There must have been a massive race war that left only white Americans alive. Finally, the biggest reason why The Flinstones is set in an apocalyptic future…
4) Rick Moranis Is Barney Rubble
You were in Spaceballs, Ghostbusters and Little Shop Of Horrors man. What the hell happened?