Alan Smithee

There are 500 idiots with holes in their pockets…

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Phallic Symbol...Check, Rediculous Price Tag....Check, Completely Useless in a Real World Situation....Check! Where do I send Monies?

Who I am sure are salivating and/or fapping about the fact that TriForce Sales is nearly done making 1:1 scale Lancer rifles from Gears of War / Gears of War 2. These won’t come cheap though, this isn’t quite the same as getting a retardedly long piece of metal and calling it Sephiroth’s Muramasa.

If you’re interested in increasing your e-peen, or just have nothing better to do with $1000, then this might just be for you.

The replica has been modeled by (a whole bunch of people you’ve never heard about unless you’re a huge nerd about such things) Jorge Martinez, Toi Ogunyoku, Paul Komoda, Erick Sosa, and William Valenzuela, and measures in at 40″ long and 15 pounds (~1 stone) of pure nerdy excess.

There will be only 500 of these guns made so anyone who is dying to have one of their own, had better get their asses to their site and sign up to ensure theirs…though we’ll all think you’re an idiot with a huge hole in your pocket.

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