Ryan Thomason

The Event on NBC is a Steaming Pile of Crap

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I take back every stupid little gushing word I’ve written about this show before. I’ve followed every episode of this show, and I just can’t take it anymore.

The show now boils down to this:

  • Sophia always calling the President or Vice President with INSERTED MOBILE PHONE AD PLACEMENT phone that if it isn’t shown ringing and then being answered at least 5 times a episode NBC will have to murder a hundred baby seals. That contract must be pretty hardcore.
  • President Martinez is MAD! ANGRY! WE WON’T TAKE THIS ANYMORE! KILL ALL THE ALIENS! “Mr President, lets tell the world leaders about the aliens that are trying to kill everyone on the planet and co-ordinate a strike.” NO! PRESIDENT DON’T UNDERSTAND RATIONAL THOUGHT ANYMORE THIS IS AMERICA! WE WILL DECIDE IF OUR STUPID ACTIONS WILL DOOM THE PLANET OR NOT! LOLZ!
  • Sean will “make things go viral” if you don’t do what he says. So there is this ex-killer CIA obligitory hot chick on the show, who has a secret son that she doesn’t want her former employer to know about because he’ll kill everyone living in the house the kid is at. SO we get Sean threatening at least once an episode that he’ll ‘Make the address go viral!” if she doesn’t do what he wants. What the hell does Sean know about making things Viral that Advertising companies spend hundreds of millions of dollars trying to do and usually fail?
  • I don’t care how hot the presidents Latina wife is, she’s a FREAKING ALIEN. She has that, “oh I’m an alien” look in her eyes when the president isn’t looking. The best thing though, was when the president was coming onto her horribly constructed rouse. She broke down and said her big secret was that her parents aren’t Cuban, their DOMINICAN! Illegal Aliens! Then the President is all. “LOL ANGRY PRESIDENT WILL JUST COVER THAT UP!” Then he smashed a table.
  • Sophia is HARDCORE now. Before she was trying to keep Thomas under control, now she’s talking about how they have to exterminate most of humanity to make way for the 2.5 billion aliens that find our planet delicious.
  • As long as you give someone a NAME and a COUNTRY. They will be found. THIS IS STUPID.
  • BLARAHAGAHAGHAASDFFHALSDKMFA…..

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This article wasn’t completed because Ryan ‘Bigbrusr’ Thomason died from a brain hemorrhage.

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