I Hate Community Games: Japanese Language Only
Over the past couple weeks I have noticed a growing trend on the Community Games section of Xbox Live. This trend is that of releasing games in Japanese language only, complete with title and description in kanji. There are currently seven, three of them having been released today and I have no idea what the hell these are doing on the US servers. A couple of these titles make the normal fare of the Community Games section look FANTASTIC as I have yet to play a single one which isn’t completely half ass, it’s pretty true that all Community Games are fucking terrible but at least they have the courtesy and drive to finish their game however craptastic and unnecessary — just how many digital aquariums and “3D” renditions of Atari games do we need?
Sometimes I ask myself why in the hell do I keep playing these god awful “games”? There are a fair bit up there that are not even games, they are applications and useless applications at that. Screen Calibrator? Yeah, your freaking TV came with that and some games, such as the Special Edition of Halo 3, even come with a disc to help you do just that if you are too retarded to adjust your TV’s settings normally and for free I might add. Remote Masseuse? Like I really need to turn my Xbox 360 controller into a fucking vibrator. And all this shit like the aforementioned digital aquariums? Do you REALLY need a fucking SCREEN SAVER for your Xbox?
Now, as I was saying why submit myself to such punishment? Do I hope that one day I will find something that was made by a couple guys in a basement or apartment that is actually worth spending money on? Maybe. I can assure you there is nothing on Community Games I would spend a single penny on; expect Kodu which is still an extreme maybe. Sometimes it would seem that the worse a game appears in screenshots the more I want to try it out, do I have some deep seeded masochistic tendencies? Maybe.
Most of them are SHUMPs and bad ones at that, none of them seemed finished at all just one perpetual level like its survival mode or something. The menu options are inane, most don’t have a “return to library” function, dead or repeated options and they almost never even have a way to go back to the title screen. There are two that are actually NOT SHUMPs and they are both much better for it I think. One seems like a direct rip of A Link to the Past with a more cartoony art style and the other is a strange platformer where every level is one of those screen moving independent of the player types and everything you touch other than pickups that sound like a mutilated Mario coin kills you. From what I have seen the voice acting is really terrible, not the “oh that person is just a bad actor” terrible I mean like a “this game must have been slapped together by people who don’t understand the language” terrible. I really don’t see how these people expect these to sell well, aside from being awful the amount of English speaking Xbox Live users that have a large enough comprehension level for Japanese to play these is, like, microscopic.