Game of Thrones: The Climb
Have you ever watched someone put together a big puzzle? Sometimes it’s just pieces that look like part of a tree fitting in next to other pieces that might be bushes. Soon enough add one more piece, and you can see a forest. That’s what this goddamned show is.
I love it, and I hate it. I love that the second I start to lose interest something interesting happens. I hate that sometimes I just have to say ok that will make sense later, and move on. All the buildup last week pays out this week, in ways that make you yell at your television; in the dark late at night, just before you remember the kids are asleep, but it’s okay, because you didn’t wake them up.
This episode ranks high on the yell at the television scale, and was highly enjoyable. The big pay out this episode was from Baelish, we knew he was manipulative, was trying to increase his own power, and Varys has kept him in check. Here we have the curtain pulled back, just a little more on what he has actually done. He is a proper bastard and is far too good at being evil. He is evil, in case you hadn’t figured that one out from the moment you saw that smarmy little moustache. Another good payout, of sorts, came from Arya’s encounter with Melisandre. There is some magnificent foreshadowing, and life pumping into this character we have seen developing. She just makes me clap like a special needs student.
Beyond The Wall
Sam and Gilly camp out, Sam knows jack shit about fires, and about talking to girls. At this point, I have no idea what is going on with these two. I can only assume they are significant in some way, but right now, they are filed away in the, yeah okay these guys will matter later.
In The North
Meera Reed and Osha fight about rabbits while Jojen Reed has a seizure and a vision. He saw Jon Snow on the wrong side of the wall surrounded by enemies. I’m getting annoyed with this. These guys get like 5 minutes of screen time, and that’s it. I just hope they get to do something before this season ends, but it doesn’t look good at this point.
Elsewhere, Theon gets tortured more. The mystery boy threatens to cut off Theon’s finger if he cannot guess who he is where they are, and why he is being tortured. Theon guesses and guesses, and when he thinks he may have guessed right, it turns out the he didn’t or he did but the sadistic kid just wants to peel his finger like a banana.
At The Wall
Jon and the wildlings arrive at the Wall, Ygritte makes fun of Jon, knows he hasn’t betrayed the Knights Watch, reminds him that he needs to be loyal to her. Later they climb the wall, Jon almost falls. Later still Jon is still climbing the wall. It’s a big wall. While climbing, Ygritte causes an avalanche and almost kills them all.
In The Riverlands
Arya learns how to use a bow, or more accurately, how to shoot Joffrey in the balls, and Melisandre shows up to run everyone’s day. They take her to Beric Dondarrion; she says he should not be brought back so many times. She seems confused how it could have happened. Then she decides to take Gendry, which pisses Arya off. Arya confronts Melisandre, and for a moment, I thought she was going to stab her face, but she just yells at her. Melisandre doesn’t seem fazed, and just tells Arya she a darkness in her, and in that darkness she sees eyes staring back at her, eyes she will shut forever.
Robb and his advisors meet with the Freys; Walder Freys demands include a formal apology from Robb, Harrenhal, and for Edmure to marry Roslin, one of his daughters. I’m sure it will be a beautiful wedding.
Roose Bolton has dinner with Jaime and Brienne. Bolton tells Jaime he will send him to King’s Landing on the condition that Jaime tell his father that Bolton had nothing to do with his incarceration getting out of hand, but Brienne gets to stay and be charged with treason.
In King’s Landing
Tywin and Olenna Tyrell verbally spar; she doesn’t want Loras to marry Cersei. She seems to think Cersei is tainted and old, and Tywin seems to think Loras prefers the company of men, to which Olenna agrees. However, Loras is the only heir to High Garden and she agrees to the marriage, after significant belittling.
Sansa and Loras awkwardly chat in the garden. Loras doesn’t seem too interested in girls. While Tyrion and Cersei aren’t happy, about whom they are supposed to marry either. While they are bonding over a shared misfortune, Tyrion decides just to ask Cersei if she tried to have him killed. Cersei “tells” Tyrion that Joffrey tried to have him killed during the battle of backwater. Then Tyrion decides it would be a good time to tell Sansa about the marriage, in front of Shae, after she refused to leave.
In the Red Keep, Varys finds Baelish who tells Varys that he is aware of Varys’ arrangement with Ros, and that he has given her to Joffrey, who has killed her with his crossbow. Baelish also boasts about thwarting the plans to save Sansa, and about being an evil bastard in general.
On The Wall
Jon and Ygritte, along with the rest of the wildlings make it to the top of The Wall, where they all enjoy the view. So we learned you can climb a big wall made of ice, but it is apparently not easy. In addition, now Jon has to figure out how to stay alive, keep his girlfriend live, and somehow stop the wildling army and the white walkers. I think we should take him luck.
We should be used to the disappointment of an episode ending by now, but I’m not. Somehow, I am never prepared for the end credits to start rolling. They have done an excellent job making each episode feel exactly like a piece of the whole. I never had much patience with puzzles, but I’m forced to be patient here. Soon enough, you and I will be able to watch all these episodes back to back. Provided you set your DVR and didn’t delete them. I did that once, it was awful.
I give The Climb two out of three arranged unhappy marriages.