Ryan Thomason

Eric and Goosh: Diablo 3 Ruins Lives

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Goosh stood outside the door, the white paint looking worn around the brass handle. As he looked down beneath the slight crack between the floor and the door itself, he could only see darkness with a fight glow creaking from the void. When he turned the handle on the door, slowly pressing it open at first, a stench overwhelmed his nostrils engaging his senses in overdrive as his eardrums were assaulted with a musical score and the sounds of death and destruction. And the clicking. The unending Clicking.

“Eric, what in the he-oooooooh my god.”

The outline of Eric hovered over his computer desk in the unlit room except for the computer screen, never did he turn back toward the intrusion at the door. His hair, clothes, everything in essence that resided in his once pristine room was a clutter of discarded garbage and jars that contained liquids and residue that no human should have to contemplate.

“DIABLO 3 IS RUINING YOUR LIFE BRO!” Was all Goosh could scream, as he covered his mouth and nose with the neck collar of his green shirt that featured the cast of The Avengers movie in dramatic poses.

Never looking away from the screen, Eric grunted. The clicking continued.

“BRO!….BROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!” Goosh continued, slowly shuffling through the room, trying to not touch anything on the outer surfaces while maintaining using one hand to keep his face covered with the shirt and his other arm outsretched trying to just touch his friend, at least to jostle him from his fixed position.

“DO NOT DISTURB ME.” was the only response Goosh could get

Goosh continued his shuffle, he was within feet of contact with his still outsretched arm. “This game came out three weeks ago and I haven’t seen you since, you got FIRED from your job at whatever that tech-whore place was called.”

A grunt in response, as a character danced on the screen, a scene of blood and destruction, items falling and being consumed into inventories in an instant of dropping. The clicking of the computors mouse unrelenting, beating like a war drum that never ends, only calling for more battle.

Goosh reached out and poked Eric, lurching him slightly to the side. The clicking ceased.

“I’ve beaten every difficulty. Twice.” Eric’s voice shook as he spoke, weary from malnutrition and sleep depreviation. He turned his head to Goosh, neck joints popping, muscles straining from the effort. “I HAVE DEFEATED THE DEMON YET CANNOT END MY QUEST”

“You’ve been pooping in your chair. That’s gross man. So. Gross.” Goosh replied, as he slowly started sliding back to the door.

Eric’s blood red eyes lit up and danced around the room as if wild. From the lack of sleep, his eyelids were drooping, twitching, fighting to close but kept open only through high caffeinated drinks.

“Oh, and there is a thunderstorm and the powers supposed to go out.” Goosh added, which at that instant all power ceased to be in their residence. “There she GOES!” Goosh snickered as he slid out of the room, pulling a flashlight from a pocket in his cargo shorts.

As he flicked on the light, all he could hear was a soft weeping coming from Eric’s room.

Artwork by Paul Mason

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