Left 4 Dead is a pretty awesome game and I’m sure that many of my fellow whores would agree. It also happens to be a great tribute to the general zombie apocalypse genre, if said genre exists and it easily feels like you’re playing a part in one of Romero’s movies. I also enjoyed reading Popa’s article on his GoW casting call and that article inspired me to make one of my own. So divide by zero and you get a “what if” scenario. What if Valve were a films studio and L4D was one of their new blockbusters?
Bill Murray as Bill
Think about it. The rumours for Ghostbusters 3 are still going around and Murray is lending his voice talent in Ghostbusters: The Video Game so there’s signs that he could make a comeback. And why shouldn’t he. We know he’s still got that comedic talent in him and I’m sure he could do a great job as playing Bill, a character who doesn’t take himself too seriously. And besides, he’d look like him too if Murray grew a beard. Murray needs a comeback and L4D would be that movie.
Samuel Motherfucking Jackson as Louis
To be honest, Louis isn’t that great of a character. He’s pretty much the wimp of the group in L4D and despite the Shaun Of The Dead white shirt and red tie, people usually only pick him if Bill and Travis are taken. This is why you need a badass like Samuel Jackson to make up for it. Sure he’s looking a bit old now but a touch of makeup wizadry can easily fix that and it’s not as if SLJ hasn’t been in a horror/thriller before. Also the epic (no kidding, I liked it) Snakes On A Plane proved that he can be in ridiculous films. So that’s why Samuel Motherfucking Jackson would be my choice for Louis.
Eva Green as Zoey
(Believe me it was hard to find a normal, non-modelling picture of Eva Green, not that it bothered me :D)
An odd choice it may seem, but a justified one. For Zoey, I needed to find an actress that is a good looker but can also play a smart role and is actually capable of acting while looking hot (think Megan Fox for example) so my final decision came to Eva Green. Casino Royale proved that she could play a beautiful yet smart character and also that she could be a victim at times too. The only problem would be the French accent, but she didn’t seem too bad pulling off a British accent in Casino Royale so I’m sure that a believable American accent wouldn’t be too hard. And finally, I needed a good looking woman if L4D were to draw in the douchebags and nerdy fanboys of L4D, if they even exist.
Tom Savini as Francis
This man has worn a cock gun. Do I need any more reason? But seriously, Tom Savini is one of the most recent legends of the horror genre and it would be great to see play a badass biker like Francis, much like Savini’s own badass biker character in the original Dawn Of The Dead. He has the experience and you could even cut on the budget by hiring him for special effects as well. The only problem would be the hair as it would need to be pretty much shaved and since he is a badass, you might fear for your life if you ask. So if the film makers of L4D were too scared to ask, they’d had to go with my second choice.
Bruce Willis as Francis (alternate)
If Die Hard 4.0 proved anything, it’s that Willis can still play a big action role after all these years. So he would be my second choice for Francis as he has a good resemblence, he can play a badass guy and if he can beat terrorists, I’m sure that he could beat the shit out of the undead too.
George Romero/Peter Jackson as Director
The first choice would seem obvious, after all L4D takes inspiration from George Romero’s Of The Dead series so it would seem like a safe bet to get the horror legend on board for directing the film. On the other hand I’m a big fan of Peter Jackson’s takes on Lord Of The Rings and King Kong and years before he made a name for himself with said films, he was making horror movies and bloody ones at that so it would be cool to see him return to the genre with L4D.
Well there you have it. It’s probably best off for L4D to stay as a game but if it always nice to think “What if?”.